When things do not go as planned in any relationship — usually such a thought in itself can be the root cause, as it could indicate that you’re a control freak— examine:
- Your intention — Do you have an ‘I win they lose’ intention? If you do, it’s going to create a ‘tug-of-war’ type situation. In a tug-of-war, both sides could suffer rope burns and sometimes twisted ankles from stubbornly digging in hard to defend a belief or a value. Each wants to win and usually both get bruised.
- Your energy— If it is too weak (you are disinterested) or over the top (you are overbearing); find the equilibrium; the zen-like balance that says you are confident and in control.
- Your body language — Your intention influences your body language. It surfaces as micro expressions, that people sub-consciously pick up. No matter what you say and how you say it, your intentions will show.
- Your presence — Once again this has to do with energy. Are you aligned, centred, truly present and dedicated to the relationship. Or are you wishy washy and appear weak?
- Your act — Be brutally honest with yourself. Stop the act, get real, you did not get here on your own.
- Your ego — In human relationship you deal with real human beings, who have desires, goals and dreams just as you have. Respect that, be respectful, show respect, and respect will inevitably and precessionally follow you. Stop pointing fingers or looking for the boogeyman anywhere else when he’s actually residing inside your head.
When attempting to fix a damaged relationship, it’s always about fixing one thing first — YOUR SELF.
The Core message: Begin your day by taking a few minutes to reflect on your self first.